This is a very important virtue one should possess, but sadly it is getting lesser in us thanks to the headphone and earphone lifestyle of ours. Now how is the headphone, and its slimmer cousin, earphone, related to tolerance, you would ask.
Yes they are. We are so particular about the song, the podcast, or mantra which we want to listen to that if some song or podcast is played which is not to our liking; we quickly cover our ears with our respected and respective earphones, and shut the ‘noise’ out. Different members of the family have different devices, and their own earphones. Each one is busy listening to or watching his own choice of entertainment. What is entertainment to one is boredom to the other.
Of course, we are taught since our school days to have our own choice, and to not follow the herd. We should have the freedom to listen to our own stuff. All that is very fair my friend. Where we go wrong is zero tolerance for the choice of the other. If we desire to buy a blue shirt and wear it to office, and our colleague decides to wear a red one, are we going to get all frustrated, and shout at the poor thing, as to what a horrid choice of colour he has. You can’t do that right? You ought not to. This world is such a beautiful place because of its diversity. Just imagine a world where everyone is wearing the same shade of colour as yours, wearing the same perfume, eating the same food, drinking the same beverage, and yes, listening to the same music. I bet, you would want to jump off the nearest cliff out of ennui and monotone. So, uniformity is lethal. Diversity is life. We are nature’s beings, full of multifariousness. So patience has to be our second nature.
We can build up our dipping levels of tolerance by watching at least a movie together on a weekend. The movie could be chosen by the youngest or oldest member of the family. It could be the fairy tale movie, the choice of the littlest girl in the family, or an old classic of the grandpa. And yes, everyone should look forward to watching it. Make it fun. Order some food, or fry some snacks. And sit with a mindset that you ARE going to enjoy it. Keep away your mobile phones for those two or three hours. Won’t it be fun? This way the little girl will also enjoy watching a movie of her parent’s choice. And yes, every member of the family should get a chance. Even if you have a full-time servant, ask him or her. If you wish to get adventurous hit the theatres. Whatever. The place doesn’t matter, the bonhomie does. And it will work wonders to raise the tolerance levels. Even yours, as you would be ‘required’ to see a movie your son has suggested and slowly start liking his genre. We can do the same thing for music too, or a podcast. This way, if you wish your young niece to listen to some motivational speaker, you could do that. Let all the members of the family listen to the guru. Let all learn in their own special ways. Maybe, grandma could also get some insight. Anyways, you are never too old to learn.
Easier said than done though. At first all would make faces, be fidgety, slowly ferret out their cellphones, and give a quick peek. Let it be that way. Slowly it would become a habit. Tolerance like all virtues is like a muscle; it needs to be exercised. Once you become more tolerant, you will be surprised to see the change in you. You will be calm, cool, and petty matters would not irk you anymore. You would start loving your job more, be friendlier with your colleague whom you first thought to be irritable, and so on. We could also think of buying things according to the choice of all the members of the family. The curtains could be chosen by the lady of the house, the bed sheets by grandma, and the cushions by the daughter. Even the little brother, all of seven, could choose the table napkins, just about anything. And you choose the cutlery. Imagine the smiles, the twinkles in the eyes, the cheer in the household, when all feel so good to see their choice of things being used. It’s a great feeling to just watch their happiness.
Tolerance pays rich dividends. Because there are times, and there are many of them when we have to perform in accordance with other’s choices, at work, in schools, at public places, and so on. This virtue is also needed by a school student who does not like some subject, yet has to learn its lessons, and score outstandingly. If the child is taught to be tolerant at an early age, he would somehow make himself ready to start liking that subject too.
Life would be so much more vibrant and positive if we build up our tolerance muscle slowly and steadily. We can manage our emotions in a better manner, and keep away from thinking about trivial issues, just because we can’t tolerate something in it, and give more of our time and mental space to creative pursuits, and all things good. So friends, start today, be more accommodating, and see the change. Just do it!
